I’d rather be golfing

A little note to the gentleman that was driving the $80,000 SUV in front of me this morning:
I saw your little license plate surround.
It said, "I'd Rather Be Golfing".

Gee, is that right?
Wouldja?
Wouldja really?

Well, that is just super.
It's really good to know that.
I found that to be an excellent use of your empty license plate space.
You are to be commended sir.

Now to me.
Do you know what I'd rather be doing?
I would rather be beating the f*** out of you for power braking to 15 mph at the first minor, insignificant, misting hint of rain on your windshield.
I would rather jerk a nine-iron out of the golf bag that is no doubt in the cargo space of that monstrosity you are driving and beat you about your head and genitals until you curl up into the fetal position and poopy into your pants.
But that won't fit on my license plate surround, now will it?

No.
No, it won't.

Here's a little tip: Get the f*** off of my freeway and go swing your Limited Edition Callaway clubs at your $100,000-a-year country club, you self-involved cock-gobbler.
I hope you have a stroke on the front nine.
I f****** hate it when someone makes me late for my Christians For A Peaceful Tomorrow rally.
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And that would be my favorite comedic monologue to use for auditions.
At least until I came upon a few deleted scenes from Knocked Up.

Good times.

Like how people wanted me to add to my list of lil' nifties I have on this Online Journal Thingy.
A counter to keep track of how many ladies I'm dating at the moment.

Which would be zero.
Leaving me at super single status as of Friday morning.

Makes people wonder how long that'll last though.
One of my friend's suggested 10mins.

Current Brain Age: 20
Current Wii Fitness Age: 25
The Random Quote:
"Your face." - Anonymous